If your a "white hat" hacker (not to be confused with actually wearing a white hat) or a computer user that also seeks to be a ninja then this is the clan for you. A “White hat” hacker is a person who tries to contribute usable stuff for the other Ninja Penguins to use. “Black Hat” hackers are the evil hackers that are also almost always pirates unless they are like double agent ninja pirate hackers and then they are both.
Want to see a Ninja Penguin? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=20XvsSQLN2U&feature=player_embedded
This Picture shows a Ninja Penguin defeating an evil Robot.
You need to know up front though that Penguin Ninjas (especially the one named Tux) are very opinionated as far as what kind of software they use. It has to meet the ninja penguin code or they will go ballistic and cut the computer user's head clean off with a sword! Ya man there is no messing around with these guys. And to make things worse they are faster than the speed of light because Ninja Penguins can travel over the Internet. If you have an Internet connection and your using anything other than Penguin Ninja approved software a Ninja Penguin could show up wile you are reading this and slice your head off. They can materialize like on Star Trek or come right out of your screen or even come out of your fax machine or something else. Ever picked up the phone and heard squealing noises like a Fax trying to come threw only you were not expecting a fax? It was probably a Penguin Ninja trying to materialize over diail up threw your phone but because dial up is so slow Penguins will use it as their last option. I mean if you hang up in the middle of a transfer the Penguin is trapped in on the Internet and will probably materialize at your friend's house and kill him instead.
So what kind of software do Penguin Ninjas use? Penguin ninjas decided that they would only use software that was free for anyone to improve or change and was not weak like those sissy operating systems that get viruses or can't run any programs. They thought Apple was kind of a sissy name just because I mean what does a apple do? It just sets there and it's defenseless. And besides that their computers cost a lot of money and Penguin Ninjas don't steel money. Penguin Ninjas just need fish. The other thing about Mac and Apple is Apple's get worms and what kind of ninja would be eaten by a worm? So the Ninja Penguins decided to use Linux and Open Source software. It doesn't get hacked by the “Black Hats”, and it doesn't get viruses or worms, and it runs all the coolest ninja software so that's why they use it.
The enemy of the Ninja Penguin is the Software Pirate.
The Pirates go out and illegally steal software they can't afford by torrenting it off the Internet. That's why the Ninja Penguins get so upset and have to slice off their heads. So maybe if your setting at your computer and your running Microsoft or Macintosh and you have paid for everything the Penguin Ninjas just might decide not to kill you for now or maybe they are just toying with you. If you want to find out more about Linux go to http://www.mindblowingidea.com/JULinux and I suggest you do it before a Ninja Penguin kills you. They are probably tracking you right now and if you don't click this link in 5 milliseconds from when you finish reading this they will materialize and kill you.
Then after clicking the link you must join this clan or they will kill you anyway because you know too much already.
If you want to see how Ninja Penguins are able to travel so fast here is a video in extra slow motion that demonstrates them flying. Be careful though. If you watch this and see the secrets of the Penguin Ninja they might just come and kill you! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HDOL7_7DB7k So why do Ninja Penguins do this? It's mainly because they want to ensure that students and working people won't have to pay $300.00 for Office software or $150.00 for anti-virus just so they can do their homework. And It's just really fun and AWESOME! Now if after all of this you haven't clicked here: http://digg.com/linux_unix/Ninja_Penguins_2 and dugg that link Ninja Penguins will just keep annoying you until you do and believe me they can be very annoying.
--- a little more info about Ninja Penguins ---
Ninja Penguins travel at the speed of light^1,999.2 before they start warping existence so that's their top speed. Because they can travel to other realities and covert themselves into digital data they are able to study on a server on the ninjanet in a computer simulation similar to the Matrix. The problem was that there was no computer fast enough to challenge the Ninja Penguins and they could not move fast while inside the server on the ninjanet. Even 1,000,000 super computers could not keep up with the speed Ninja Penguins move at so we had to figure out how to build a computer capable of this great speed. We decided to replicate several Penguin Ninjas but without brains and shrink them down to the size of atoms and build the computer's NPU out of that. (Ninja Processing Unit) Now we are able to train in a virtual world against virtual opponents that can fight back at the speed of light^1,999.2. Now the ninjanet is in another reality and it's compatible with most computer but you need a special modem that has the ability to send data back and forth between realities and a web browser that can go to http://nn.the website you want to go to.com. The only way you are going to get one of these modems and the web browser you need is by becoming a Penguin Ninja and then you have to pass the test.
Now Ninja Penguins don't even need to swing a sword at someone to kill them since they are faster than the speed of light. They can simply run or fly right threw you like a lazer. All of their atoms turn in to photons when they match the speed of light and after that they become a different element that can't be placed on the periodic table because this substance moves too fast to be studied.
Einstein figured out a way to slow it down so we could study it but that would require so much power the sun would burn out.
To sign up to our clan and avoid decapitation click here: http://fans.askaninja.com/group/linuxninjas
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